Jeremy Kroeker

Toronto SUPERSHOW

Jeremy — Tue, 06 Jan 2009 03:25:21 +0000

I said I’d try and update you all on the show today if I had time… UNFORTUNATELY, I have time. Why is that unfortunate? Because I’m stuck. I made it to Sault Ste. Marie, Ontario today, fully intending to drive another 200 kilometres or so before finding a motel. But when I got here, I found the highway closed due to poor driving conditions. Now, poor driving conditions is something I’m used to in this neck of the woods. Let me illustrate. Pictured below is the car I’m driving (borrowed from my Dad because mine broke down just days before I had to leave for Ontario). This is what it should look like:

And here’s how it looked after 3,000 kilometres of driving across the prairies and into Toronto:

What’s all that crap on the side of the car? I’ll give you hint…

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Supershow

Jeremy — Sun, 04 Jan 2009 14:06:34 +0000

I know that many of you have been checking in to see how the show is going and you’re disappointed at the lack of information. It’s not that I’ve been lazy or negligent, exactly, but rather exhausted. Every day I stand at my booth for 11 hours saying, “…it’s about a trip I did from Canada to Panama. (Pause.) It talks about the trip, obviously, and a few things I learned on the road, but mostly it’s just supposed to make you laugh. (Pause.) But that’s not a money back guarantee. Ha, ha.” Now, I’m not being aloof and artificial. I’m merely conserving energy. When people take a genuine interest in me or the book, then I switch to “actual conversation” mode. I’ve met many interesting people, and hopefully I’ll have a more detailed update later today or tomorrow. Then I drive all the way back for the Calgary Show. Before I leave you, though, to answer your questions regarding sales figures - I think I’m doing as well as I absolutely need to in order to pay for my trip out East. Beyond that, I can’t say. I’m happy I came.

Opportunity

Jeremy — Thu, 01 Jan 2009 00:11:00 +0000

While setting up my booth at the Toronto International Motorcycle SUPERSHOW, I was delighted to find myself situated right beside Mark Richardson, author of “Zen and Now: On the Trail of Robert Pirsig.” He and his family were setting up and cleaning off his Suzuki DR 600 that he rode through the pages of his popular book. When I learned that he was also an editor with the Toronto Star and a personal friend of Ted Simon, I realized that an opportunity had fallen into my lap… an opportunity to embarrass myself.

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Moving out

Jeremy — Thu, 25 Dec 2008 21:33:14 +0000

Fortunately for me, generating sales at a busy store on the Saturday before Christmas is like shooting fish in a barrel. Aside: does anyone else wonder how easy it is to shoot fish in a barrel? I suppose it depends on the concentration of fish. For example, if there’s three fish in a 500 gallon drum filled with water, that would be difficult/impossible… unless the fish themselves are HUGE. OK, back to the post. The point is, I had a great event at the Sunridge Chapters in Calgary. I did so well, in fact, that the evening may have paid all my fuel costs from Calgary to Toronto. You see, having a huge inventory of books, I seldom think in terms of dollars and cents anymore. I think, “Alright. I need to sell x number of books to pay for a replacement vehicle for my car that died.” (That number, by the way, is around 300 depending on the vehicle and on where the sales come from. Amazon only pays me $1.00 per book, but I get more if people buy direct from me.) So, let’s break this down and see where I’m at. This is me posing with the second street bike I ever owned. (I sold it to my dad, just as I did with the first street machine. Thankfully, Dad has a sentimental streak and managed to keep the 82 Honda. One day, he or I may just restore it to it’s former glory. I’m rambling again.)

The point is, beneath my feet is the approximate number of books that I need to sell at the SUPERSHOW in Toronto to pay for the trip. I won’t really make money, mind you, but I won’t regret taking the risk. Is this a reasonable amount of stock to move? Well, judging by previous sales records at the Calgary Motorcycle Show, yes. I think I can move this much product. (The Toronto show is bigger than the Calgary show by a significant margin.)

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Vulnerability

Jeremy — Fri, 19 Dec 2008 00:39:01 +0000

I was not impressed. For our Christmas party in Banff, we squeezed into a tiny booth at a fondue restaurant without predicting the disparity between cost and quality of experience. The company and conversation were pleasant. The food was nice, too, but not nearly as nice as one might expect after a glance at the bill. I left rubbing my eyes and smelling of canola oil. I stayed in Banff for the night because I had a book signing the next day in Cascade Plaza - the same venue where I produced the “best signing ever” at my last appearance. The next day, having brought along no change of clothes, I struggled back into the pants I had recently shrunk in the wash (how I failed to notice this the night before is beyond me. Perhaps I merely wanted to believe they still fit) and walked to the store. There I sat with my pant hems creeping towards my knees and my clothing from the night before still reeking like a fry cook after a 12 hour shift. And no one came to my table. Try as I might to appear approachable, people steered clear of me. I felt very vulnerable. I suddenly found myself weary of promotion, doubting in fact, whether I should even bother to stay. I did (I’m stubborn) and I closed out the session with moderate success, after all. And then, walking to the highway, I hitch-hiked home to Canmore. What a fitting end to the episode.

Literally Speaking

Jeremy — Sun, 14 Dec 2008 02:44:57 +0000

Man, am I ever taking this whole “starving artist” thing WAY too literally. I mean, I took low-paying, part-time employment so that I could really buckle down and write. And then, I took a large risk by ordering 1,000 copies of Motorcycle Therapy when, really, I didn’t have a job. I figured though (in a moment of uncharacteristically wild optimism) that I would move a HUGE amount of stock at the upcoming International Motorcycle SUPERSHOW in Toronto (yes. I know it’s overly dramatic to always capitalize SUPERSHOW. It’s just the way the event organizers do things.) Anyway, I’m still optimistic, and I’m still hoping to do well at the show, but things remain on the razors edge of falling apart for me at the moment. Like, I could not cope right now with even the slightest unforeseen financial wrinkle. If, for example, an unusually stiff frost hit Florida thereby raising the price of produce by 10 cents a pound, I’d have to declare bankruptcy. Which is why I nearly fainted when my car broke down last week. I needed that car to transport myself and my books to Toronto. I suppose I can’t begrudge the old Sable for finally shuffling off to the Great Junkyard in the Sky. No, it served me well. After all, I got it for FREE years ago (coincidentally on the very next day that my truck died with dramatic flare, bursting into flames to light up the winter night. Now that I think about it, the car I had before my truck also met a strangely violent end. Some kids broke the window, released the emergency brake and pushed it off a cliff. Weird.) Anyway, my dad has graciously offered to lend me his wheels to get from Saskatchewan to Ontario, and it may even become necessary for him to drive out and collect me from Alberta. That’s all well and good, but what happens after the Toronto show? At this point, I’m hoping for a miracle.
For the sentimental bunch, click HERE for a beautiful farewell to my precious Sable. A warning, though. You better have handy a box of facial tissue. It’s a real tearjerker.

Good news/Bad news

Jeremy — Mon, 08 Dec 2008 20:52:32 +0000

The nice thing about renting a room from a climbing partner is that you don’t have to organize pickup times, and you don’t have to sort gear when you’re wet and cold. Those details take place at home. The bad thing is that, when you fully intend to sleep in and relax on a Sunday, you may well get a knock on your door just before you go to bed and hear, “Are we going ice climbing tomorrow?” Of course we are. And so, I set my alarm once again…

(Stock Photo)

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Why I hate ice climbing. Or, Nemesis is my nemesis.

Jeremy — Mon, 01 Dec 2008 01:53:26 +0000

I know. I mentioned how much I hated early starts in a previous post. I won’t belabor that point. But COME ON! Look at my freaking alarm clock! Getting up this early for anything that does not make a man money is ridiculous. So why bother? Well, Tom and I planned to climb an ice route called “Nemesis” today. We tried last week too, but we left Canmore late… at 5:30 AM. Arriving at the parking lot, we found at least one party had beaten us to the punch (this route requires a long hike in and, due its nature, cannot accommodate more than one team). This is not the first time Nemesis has denied me. In fact, Nemesis has sort of become my nemesis. I’ve wanted, intended, and attempted to climb it no fewer than five times. Every time another reason pops up why I can’t get it done - a partner backs out at the last minute, the temperature drops dangerously during my days off, we arrive too late, etc. Vowing not to be scooped this time, we left Canmore an hour earlier. This way, we would arrive at the climb well before sunup. No one in their right minds would plan to get there any sooner.

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Best signing EVER!

Jeremy — Sun, 30 Nov 2008 04:27:40 +0000

“Best signing EVER!” That’s what the manager of the Indigo Spirit said to me when I finished. During the four hours I sat signing books at the Cascade Plaza in Banff, I racked up sales stats to match the best night he had ever witnessed. Impressive? Yes and no. After the first hour, when I had merely sold my second book, the manager approached me and said, “Well, you’ve already had the second best sales event I’ve seen.” That’s right. Most authors at this location, he told me, manage to sell just one book for the day. So, how many sales does it take to top the record books? Ten. OK, so I’m not going to retire anytime soon. But, ten books represents fully 1% of the inventory I have to move before my survival is assured. I just need to replicate this night one hundred times and I’m set.

I remember

Jeremy — Mon, 24 Nov 2008 04:29:25 +0000

For those of you who have read Motorcycle Therapy, you may recall that I used to practically live for ice climbing. Then for one reason or another, I just sort of stopped. Injury had something to do with it, sure. But more than that, I just sort of lost motivation and, for the longest time, I couldn’t remember why. Today I had the opportunity to jog my memory. First off, it’s the early starts. Seen in the image above, my friend Tom. He’s reading the guidebook on the side of the road at around 7:45 am. “That’s not so early,” you say. Yeah. Well, we drove over 2.5 hours to get here. Do the math.

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